My sister would have been 26 today. It saddens me that I never got the chance to know her…to be able to do all the sisterly things that girls do. Who knows how my life would have turned out. I can’t say that I’m any better for being an only child. More spoiled? Yes. Occasionally I ponder how my life would have turned out had she survived. (She died four days after birth from a hole in the heart.) I lit candles in her memory last night (I won’t be home tonight), same as I do every year. There’s been times when Halloween has been difficult for my Mother…my Dad, I couldn’t say. He’s never been one to wear his emotions on his sleeve, at least, not in front of me. But I’ve seen the sadness in my Mother’s eyes many times around this time of year.
It has also been a year since the murder of a daughter of a friend of ours. It was a year ago that Denise, owner of Stonewall Cafe, lost her 18 year old daughter in a brutal stabbing.
And people say there’s a god.
Maybe this is why I have trouble believing.