You Know You’re From Philly (Or A Philly Suburb) If…

9/10/2009 by raspberryvixen

You’ve never referred to Philadelphia as anything but “Philly.” And New Jersey has always been “Jersey.”  (OMG, YES!)

You refer to Pennsylvania as “PA.” (Ditto!!)

You know how to pronounce Bryn Mawr, Schuylkill, Bala Cynwyd, Duquesne, Punxsutawney, Susquehanna, and Allegheny.  (Why yes, I can.  Although, Schuylkill?  It’s the SURE-KILL.  Heh.)

You know what a “Mummer” is.  (Unfortunately.)

You can use the phrase “fire hall wedding reception” and not even bat an eye.

You absolutely hate T.O.  (Hate isn’t a strong enough word.)

You really miss Y-100.

At least 5 people on your block have electric “candles” in all or most of their windows all year long.

Words like “hoagie”, “sticky buns”, “shoo-fly pie”, “pierogies” and “pocketbook” actually mean something to you.

You know the time and location of every “wing night” in a 20 mile radius.

You consider an exotic vacation to be a trip to Ocean City, Virginia Beach, or Myrtle Beach.

You think very little of an Amish buggy on the road.

You’ve run up the steps to the art museum emulating Rocky at least once.

You know that Intercourse, Climax, Virginville, Paradise, Mars, and Slippery Rock, Blue Ball, and Bird in Hand are all PA towns.

You love Birch Beer.  (Not really, but hey.)

You consider Pittsburgh to be “out west,” and you know the fastest way to Philly is the Turnpike.

When the forecast said snow, you stayed up waiting for them to announce that school was cancelled.  (EVERY. DAMN. TIME.)

You know that more than two inches of snow will at least get you a two hour delay.

You have an uncontrollable urge to buy bread and milk when you hear the word “snow.”

You live within two miles of a plant that makes potato chips, corn chips, pretzels, candy, or ice cream, or that packages turkeys, beans, or bologna.

You think the roads in any other state are smooth.  (BWHAHAHHAHA.  True dat.  The first time I took I-83 northbound from MD to PA…you could tell EXACTLY where the state line was by where the road surface changed from smooth to shitty.)

Refer to something as “a whole nother,” e.g., “That’s a whole nother issue.”

You punctuate every sentence with, “You know” at least twice.

You want olive oil, not mayonnaise on your hoagie.  (I like mayo, personally.  But that really didn’t happen until I moved to Maryland.)

Your favorite dessert is water ice. (pronounced “wooder” ice)  (Hell’s YEAH.  Give me a large watermelon Rosati’s.  None of this Rita’s bullshit.)

You find yourself using “yo” and “youse guys” when talking long-distance to family members.

You find yourself at a nice restaurant thinking “I wonder if they have cheese steaks?”

You visit New York and are impressed by how clean it is.

You’ve had more than one debate on why Wawa is better than Sheetz. (Not really, because there never was a Sheetz around here until like five years ago.)

You call sprinkles on top of your ice cream cone “jimmies”.  (Love me my multicolored jimmies, man!)

You can’t imagine lunch without a Tastykake.

A vacation at the Jersey shore is better than going to an island (there’s more stuff to do, plus you know everybody.)  (TWO MORE DAYS UNTIL VACATION AT THE JERSEY SHORE!!!!)

You know where to find the Rocky statue.

You’ve had more than one argument over why your place for cheesesteaks is the best.  (Jim’s.  And don’t you dare argue that fact with me.)

You’ve never been to the Liberty Bell, or the only time you were there was on a class trip in third grade.  (Actually, I think it was in like the fourth grade…)

You know what and where “Boathouse Row” is.  (It’s so beautiful at night!)

You will buy a pretzel from anyone, anywhere without even thinking of where it was – or where his hands have been.

You can’t imagine a breakfast without scrapple.

You don’t know what a sub is, but you think they are trying to describe an imitation HOAGIE.

You aren’t a bandwagon Sixers fan, you loved them when they sucked, and before they had A.I.  (Yeah…NO.  Never been a Sixers fan.  FLYERS FAN ALL THE WAY.  I bleed black and orange!)

You go to The Gallery or South Street in the summer time just to chill.

You call the Dallas Cowboys the Cowgirls.  (Nah, that’s actually what we called the Cowboys!)

When every year a team makes it close to or to the post season and yet every year you still find your self saying I know how this is gonna end…there’s always next year. (At least the Phillies finally broke the curse last year!)

If you never took a field trip to anywhere other than the Franklin Institute, the zoo, the art museum, or the museum of natural science.  (Been there, done that…numerous times over.)

If you listen to Preston and Steve EVERY morning.

If you know every word to the theme song from the Fresh Prince of Bel Air.

If you know what it means if someone refers to something as a “jawn”


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